Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Super Trivia!

What’s this?

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It’s a chicken!

I almost burnt my house down this evening. The way I see it, I’ve got a number of things I could blame it on. Here’s my list:

1) Sleep deprivation. Those are long assed flights and I’m not sure I made it half asleep through the most of them. At least this time I had less than an hour wait at Heathrow. And I have to say, I agree with an entry I read some months back by some other blogger, Heathrow airport is the worst on the planet. I can understand the increased security but what I can’t understand is the sheer rudeness of the employees there. We’re NOT all terrorists waiting to blow you up! Some of us just want to go home! Nor can I stand some security bitch talking with another security bitch about which confiscated items she’s taking home, in front of other passengers they’re taking more crap from.

2) Viral Infection. My three year old twin, niece and nephew were suffering something awful when I reached my sisters house. It was a great joke that I’d probably be taking this cold home with me while I was there but what are the chances really that I’d get off the plane pretty much fine, and go to sleep only to wake up with all the symptoms? It’s nothing compared to what I was suffering prior to my trip and I’ll get over it real soon I’m sure. But at the moment, it feels like every orifice in my head is leaking or wants to explode. (I had chronic ear infections a few years back and for the first time since, I have another one and I literally think the right side of my head will explode if I don’t chew on Brufen every couple of hours.)

3) Brain disconbobulation. I’m not even sure that I actually got home yet. But back to the burning down the house, I would have thought number 1 was the lowest temperature setting on the damn thing… Turns out on my mama’s stove, number 1 is in fact the highest and number 5 is the lowest. I suppose that’ll teach me to put something in the oven, thinking I know what I’m doing and it’ll be fine while I take a twenty-minute (that turns into forty-minute) nap.

I woke up and the amount of smoke in the house had me certain that I’d burned at least the kitchen part down. I suppose I should be thanking God it was only the chicken, but instead I cried because I’d ruined dinner. I had the boy coming to break his fast with me.

With forty minutes until iftar (that’s the time that Muslims break their fast during this month, for those who don’t know), and a guest on their way, I still managed to defrost more meat, marinate it, and cook something up that was edible and actually enjoyable. Granted, we had to eat in a house half-filled with smoke because it just wouldn’t escape through every open door and window – like it enjoyed taunting and teasing me.

Nonetheless, sick, jetlagged, and over-discombobulated I still saved the day. Know what that says to me? It says I’m Superwoman! Would you like to argue that?

***So you all know, Balushi has accepted my invitation and I’ve told him he’s welcome to post here anytime. Hopefully, he’ll keep you all entertained while I’m not. Just do me a small favor and note who’s writing what in here from now on. I love Balushi, but God forbid you all think I’m posting his words or vice-versa!


Blogger bklyn_in_dubai said...

are you sure that's a chicken? it's got that evil red eye, long snout look of a bandicoot i tried, and failed, to kill once in india. hit it square on the head with an axe. that just pissed him off and he dug up my entire courtyard to get back at me.

11:24 AM, October 11, 2006  
Blogger Unknown said...

TF: We've had a whale of a time looking at this picture - LOL.

After having spoken to PETA (People for Ethical Treatment of Animals), they suggested that you catch up on your jet lag before having fun in the Kitchen - LOL.

Lady sends her Best to you too :D

12:21 PM, October 11, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

Brkln… it was a chicken when I put it in the oven. At least I think it was. Perhaps I cooked your Bandicoot (what the hell is a bandicoot?) with less than half the effort you must have used attempting the same?

Symphony… I chuckle at it myself now. But you can bet your ass it wasn’t funny waking up to that! I could have had a heart attack or something. I literally thought my house was on fire! loooool. If only I could have seen my own hysteria. Now that would be something to laugh at.

And send those regards right back.

1:05 PM, October 11, 2006  
Blogger Shaykhspeara Sha'ira said...

Welcome home Tainted. I hope you can relax a while now before you get back to life, or rather, life gets back to you, and that you're fully recovered inshallah.


1:36 PM, October 11, 2006  
Blogger Taunted said...

So it's now official - Tainted can't cook either!!

(Are you sure you took it out the bag first?

2:47 PM, October 11, 2006  
Blogger bklyn_in_dubai said...

ah Tainted, be grateful you have not crossed paths with the feared bandicoot. aside from being a cute critter video game (passe by now i'm sure), it looks like an oversized mole, or a super-oversized rat, or very much like an armadillo -- same size, no shell, long menacing snout. not advisable to import to keep as a housepet.

10:01 AM, October 12, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

SS... Thank you. a photo anywhere? Almost sounds cute to me!

2:26 AM, October 13, 2006  

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