Cost of my sanity

I couldn’t sleep last night. It’s my birthday today. And for me, that’s a depressing thing. I spent the night wondering what happened to me, why I ended up so alone, how I secluded myself from the world, why I feel so old, when in reality, I just turned 25.

Eventually, around 4am I decided to take my shower and leave for work.

I live in Ajman. I work in Abu Dhabi. I drive back and forth every day.

This morning, I reached Shk Zayed rd, near Diyafa St. around 4.45am. I was disgusted at the amount of traffic already there, but it wasn’t shocking; this is the Emirates after all. As some inconsiderate idiot in the fast lane insisted on driving 110kms/h without regard for anyone behind him, I casually overtook him on the right side. Just as I passed him I got flashed. I knew the radar was there, I knew it would flash at 120Kms/h, it just didn’t register in my head.

If you call 8007777 you can get the total amount of traffic fines you’ve accumulated. Actually, you can have them sent to you by sms. A great way to play with your friends because you get to choose the number the fine message gets sent to. It comes direct from Dubai Police, stating “YOU have this many fines and must pay this amount”, without stating the license plate number.

Anyway, back to what I was saying…

A couple of weeks ago, I was up at about 3000Dhs. So, this morning’s radar, in addition to the one I got last night, brings my approximate total to 3400Dhs, and that’s not including the one’s I didn’t notice or weren’t yet calculated.

I realized something with this morning’s flash; I wasn’t bothered by it. And it’s not because I have bags & bags of money to waste or think the fines are small. Actually, the opposite is true. I don’t have the money to waste on traffic fines at all. If I did, I probably wouldn’t be living in Ajman.

But, in comparison to the amount of money I’d have to spend seeing a psychiatrist over my road rage, my utter fall into insanity, 3400Dhs is a small fraction to pay. And that’s not even including the mental stress I suffer every time I pass yet another ‘go-cart’ driver, or idiot who got his license out of a cereal box. And we all know about the physical health problems caused by stress, now don’t we?

A while back, there were articles in the papers about ‘Mad Max,’ as they called him. He allegedly smashed his 4x4 into a whole a bunch of cars before being physically forced (by impact) to stop. Regardless of what the reports said and regardless of what the spectators thought, I feel sympathy for him; more than the owners of the vehicles he damaged.

You see, in my opinion, ‘Mad Max’ was simply acting on pure road rage. He’d had enough, and finally lost his mind. Chances are, if I didn’t speed passed all the inconsiderate idiots in the fast lane, or drive down the yellow line, cutting in at the front of traffic jams… I’d go insane and do a ‘Mad Max’ too. A hundred times I’ve told myself that the next time I have a small accident, I’m should deliberately hit as many other cars as possible, to cause damage to the vehicles, purely for the sake of getting that number of cars in a garage for repair, and off the damn roads for a while. Should I lose hold of my sanity, I might just act on such psychotic inclinations. So, add the physical cost of potential injury caused to myself and to others, to the list of costs I’ve listed above and you do the math.

A few radars & traffic violation fines, against Hospital & Treatment costs for both psychological & physical damage, in addition to losing my mind (I have very little of that to spare), and ever rising stress levels. And leave out the amount of money I’d potentially lose because I’m spending hours more on the roads instead of at work; actually making money, and you do the math.

I’ll pay the radars any day, thank you very much.