I am…

I bitch. I complain. I have very strong opinions. I generalize. I tear the shit out of people from time to time.

I compliment. I comfort. I learn. I individualize. I defend when I feel my defense is needed.

I love. I hate, but usually only temporarily; when I’m still hurting. I feel guilt and regret and at those times I try to make things right. I can and do hear selectively from time to time.

I’m my own worst enemy. Over the last week or so I’ve been through something I wish upon no other person. I can not drag the details here, but as I’m healing (hopefully) from this experience, I’m contemplating a great many things.

I’m abrupt. I removed my blog because I was unable to think about anything else, and as most people know I write what’s on my mind. When restrictions make that impossible to do, I find myself speechless. I didn’t want to deal with the bullshit that comes along with comments on some of my older entries and I really didn’t have the energy to sort anything else out.

I’m selfish. I stopped caring about just about everything except my own issues. And I only read other blogs as an attempt to take my mind off my own personal misery.

I think I’m back now. I can’t be sure. But I am sure that what I’ve just gone through has had a profound effect on my entire life… because of it, I’m not sure anymore where this little blog of mine is going to take me.

All I know is I’m here again. I’m sorry to all those who got all confused about my disappearance. And thank you all for the emails.

A special thank you goes out to Balushi, Samurai Sam, Silver Sara, Hot Lemon & Honey and Laart.

I honestly don’t know what I would have done without your support.

I am back. I think.