See, I’m even an idiot.
Let’s just get this outta the way, already…
A while back, I wrote this lover-ly little disclaimer in my other on-line journal. I really didn’t think it was needed here, since this journal is toned waaaaay down in comparison; but it seems some people still don’t get it.
So here we go:
Let’s make this real fucking clear
I don’t need you to tell me that:the syntax in my journal is completely fucked. I don’t give a shit. I don’t intend for this fucking book to become a “great piece of literature,” nor do I give a fuck if people can or can’t understand what I’m saying because I’ve misplaced a few fucking commas or mistyped a few fucking words.
that I can be mean, immature, incredibly emotional, a complete contradiction, a nasty little bitch that you don’t like, manipulative, opinionative, loud spoken, incredibly stupid at times, offensive, my own worst enemy, or even that I need help. You see, I’m already fucking aware of all this. And it’s just sad for you, if this is all you can see in me, because there is so much more that you refuse to see.
that I am hated. I’m well fucking aware of that one too. But you see, the number of people who hate me compared to the number that would give me the shirt off their backs is fucking minimal. If you’re delusional enough to think that every fucking person you know likes you, then I pity you.
that I have a dirty mouth. If you think I can’t see the shit that I type, or acknowledge the content rating on my own fucking journal, then I’m afraid it’s you that needs some serious advice possibly from a professional.
that I can be wrong. I know that one too. And you know what; most of us have this fucking attribute! The difference between the majority and myself, I can fucking admit it when I’m proven wrong, and even consider the possibility when I’m not wrong and offer an apology in both cases.
that you just don’t *get* why I write what I do. This shit isn’t for you to get. It’s for me. And you shouldn’t be in here if you can’t comprehend that.
that I’m always fucking angry at someone. The only fucking way you could come to such a conclusion is if you’ve only read a few select entries here and there, therefore you’re in no fucking position to judge me as a whole.
that I can be egocentric, immodest, crude, vulgar, heartless, destructive, a fucking idiot at times. I’ve heard it all before and I know it as well.
The fact is, I’ve been called, heard and noted almost every negative thing a person could possibly have attributed to them. The bottom line is, I’m as honest about what I think and feel as I fucking can be. When you lay it all out the way I do here, chances are you’re going to have to hear the same sort of shit. If you think I haven’t already heard or pondered your negative shit on my own, you’re sadly mistaken. But on top of all these shitty attributes, I’m a pretty great fucking person.I love and I am loved. I give, and I care. I am a true fucking friend, to friends. And I always, always try to make sense of my world. I mean what I say, when I say it. But that doesn’t mean that statement is forever true. Things change, and so do I, almost on a daily basis.I try very hard to make myself a better person. If you think you’re in a position to judge me, you can get fucked and that’s the last word.