Creative Romance…

I am a romantic at heart and I believe that romance is something that needs to be worked on in every relationship, no matter how long you have been with your loved one. A fire won’t continue to burn if you don’t add matter to it every now and then. I’m huge on this belief.

I spent yesterday evening burning a CD of soppy love songs for my boy & writing a love letter on the cover. I spent the day selecting the perfect greeting cards to tell him I love him. All of which are waiting for him today. We’ve been together on and off for more than two years now, and I still send him hand-written love letters. I still leave short love notes in the fold of his wallet, or pocket of his freshly washed and ironed clothing. When I borrow his car, I often place a fresh picked flower or sweet candies on the seat when I return the keys to him. These sorts of creative expression are common in our relationship. He writes love messages in the steam of the mirror after he showers for me to find later when I bathe myself, or leaves good-morning notes on my pillow while I sleep.

A few days ago, I started to think about other ways I could creatively add a bit of romance, a tad of love to this relationship; ones that I’ve not already tried. I Googled a number of key words looking for creative tips. Most of the sites were blocked, inspiring this entry.

A long while back I went on a rant about divorce and women’s bitching when chances were it was their fault. I followed this entry with a rant about men, and how just as often it’s the man’s fault. No one was left out when it comes to placing blame in general circumstances. Now I’m going to give you all tips on silly little ways you can spice up your relationship. These are some of the things that I’ve done in the past of have had done for me. If you can think up any of your own, please place them here. Because I’m looking for new creative ways to help keep those fires burning.

Unisex Tips (you can do these for your male or female partner)

1) Hand written love letters (and try actually mailing them to your baby’s work or even home address), it’s a lover-ly surprise for anyone on the receiving end.

2) Scrap-book: make a scrap book of all the things that remind you of your lover, include photographs, tips & ‘I-love-about-you’ lists. Give as an unexpected gift or even better, make it together!

3) Mixed tapes or CD’s. This one is pretty self explanatory – and it only sounds clichéd because it’s so common due to the fact that it DOES induce romantic feelings. Leave the tape/cd in your lovers car player for them to hear when they step inside, or simply hand it to them.

4) Hidden notes: Imagine opening your wallet at the ATM or a pay counter to find a note from your lover tucked inside saying something as simple as, “You’re the wo/man of my dreams”, “I’ll never forget last night”, or “Where ever you are at this moment, know I’m thinking of you.” It’d sure brighten my day. These notes work just as wonderfully when left in unobvious places, like the fridge, or on the steamy bathroom mirror!

5) Sweet Poetry Puzzle. It’s not so much about writing a sweet poem as it is about writing the letters on the back of m&m’s and numbers on the other side, instructing your lover to align them all properly before flipping them over to read whatever sweet lines you’ve versed for them.

6) Lovers Coupons:



This is an actual coupon (a bad photograph, I know) I made and gave my boy in a collection of 10 or 15 of the same a year or so ago. This particular one reads, “This coupon entitles (his name) to One Cuddly Bear-Hug with (my name).” It’s complete at the bottom with, “This coupon is valid for one use only and may be used at any place at any time.”

These are easy to make and oh-so-sweet. Believe it or not, his returning this coupon was the start to one of our ‘make-ups’ after an argument. Other things you can award on coupons like this are, 1) massages; 2) bubble baths; 3) kisses; 4) home cooked meals; 5) hand packed picnics on the beach, etc. You can even get naughty with them, if your relationship works that way. *wink*

7) Write a book & have it bound. If you’re reading this, you must have some sort of aptitude for the ‘written word’ even if it’s just blogging. How hard is it to write a child’s story about you and your lover, changing the coffee shop where you met into a shoe market, his/her job into a shoemaker and you the prince/princess without the right pair of shoes? And how hard is it to fabricate an end that's still unknown, where the two of you live happily ever after? Do you have any idea how sweet this gift is? And how deep the actual references to your relationship; the spoon you still keep from the first date for example, as a treasure found in an old shoe box in the story; the sister in law from hell, acting just that in the story, will touch your loved one? Print it out at home on A5 paper, have it bound for pennies in a place like Kinkos!

8) Create a lovers crossword puzzle. The fact that you’re reading this means you must have access to a computer and most probably the program Excel. Format the cells to fit one letter each and create your own crossword puzzles. Examples of topics can include “Things you two enjoyed together,” “Lovers Nick-Names”, “Places you’ve enjoyed”, etc. Other creations like this can be made with the concept of Word Un-Scramble, etc.

9) Dress yourself just for him/her. This is something that I’m sure all of us fall out of doing eventually. Life often gets in the way and we take for granted that we once prepared ourselves extensively for a meeting with our loved ones. It seems even harder when we live together. But take the time, when s/he’s out shopping to dress yourself and prepare for their return, just to see the look in their eyes as they fall on the beautified you. This serves to remind them that despite everything, they’re still as important if not more so than they were at the start of your relationship. And this works both ways. Take care of yourself for your lover if you can’t do it for you.

10) Remember your loved one while you’re not with them. Don’t forget to tell them, through text messages even, that you’re thinking of them even as they’re away. Another way to do this, is to pick up an unexpected love card while you’re out in your travels and give to them without any cause for celebration other than the fact that you’re still together and you’re still in love.

I honestly believe that love doesn’t have to get old no matter who you are or how long you’ve been together. But to keep it alive it takes work on both sides. If you abuse or neglect it enough, you will lose it. These are some of the things I’ve found help keep my love alive, though many would argue he and I were doomed from the start – and at times even we agree with that opinion.

So now it’s your turn. Give me your thoughts or share your tips. I’m waiting!