Wednesday, March 29, 2006

I'm sorry. You weren't lying.

When my X told me about this three years ago, I called him a liar.

But according to an article in today’s Gulf News, laborers are deliberately jumping in front of cars with hopes of getting hit, so that their families back home will receive the blood money.

I’m always reading about the shame of people coming here and not returning to their homes empty handed. With as much respect as I can offer such people, after reading this… My family would rather live in a cardboard box, under a bridge and eat from garbage bins together, than have any one of us commit suicide for our financial sake. And my family lacks the closeness most Asian families seem to have.

There is something seriously wrong with any nation that generally feels money is more important than human life; whether it be the life of your brother, sister or even your own.

I have a friend who was hit from behind on Dubai-Sharjah Rd. He was hit with such force he smashed into the car in front of him. It was a very old car, and the driver was a very old man. The car caught on fire, and the driver died. My friend paid blood-money, and fasted for 60 days strait, even though he wasn’t actually the one to cause the accident. He still shows signs of severe guilt whenever he thinks and talks about it.

For each and every asshole who thinks killing themselves (and ruining a driver’s life, literally stealing his money, sending him to jail and forcing him to live with such gut-wrenching guilt for his remaining days) is something they’d like to do… I sincerely hope when you do get hit, your body is so severally mutilated it’s impossible to tell who you are, or where to send the money.


Blogger samuraisam said...

I've heard about this a long time ago, I have no doubts that it happens.

Not exactly a newsflash imho, assuming they got paid 700 dhs a month, it'd take over 17 years to gather that amount of money, of course that is without spending a single cent on themselves.

The saddest part I’ve heard about this ‘send money home’ sort of thing is that the families (some of them) spend all of the money on, for instance, new furniture and painting their houses a new color. The small amount they get in the UAE is a heck of a lot in India for instance, it’s a pity the family back home (from what I’ve heard) usually are reluctant to lift a finger. (this is only what I’ve heard from a housemaid we employed once)

3:38 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

I've heard the same thing sam, by so many other housemaids & even office boys about sending all their money home... (and I don't think it's always Indian, either)

The GUILT they have to suffer if they're not able... It hurts. They are forcing their family members either into the misery they live here, or to stay in it once they realize for themselves how horrible it is.

But in this case, the guy came on a VISIT visa. Didn't even have a job before he left. How can his family allow him to feel this ashamed when he didn't even have a guaranteed income to start with? It's corrupt.

3:48 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Jayne said...

I saw the article in GN today & was absolutely horrified that these men should have to resort to such an action in order to make life 'comfortable' for their family back home. There's much to be said either way - no one forces the workers to come here, but then when the shit hits the fan & they step in front of a car/truck whatever, the devastation they put on the driver is just as horrific. Ultimately, I don't think anyone really scores do they? The person tops himself, so he's no longer got a life to look forward to. His family, back home, are wealthy for a short while perhaps, but surely not happy because they're minus the father/husband & the poor bugger who has the misfortune to be the driver of the car that hits him, will no doubt live with deep trauma for the rest of his days. No one wins do they?

5:20 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

'It has all to do with the hopeless feelings these poor mortals suffer from largely dependent on thei socio/econmic/class or strata they've been born into.'

It's not that I don't understand the motives. It's that I can't accept a family, coming from the same economy & financial situation, allowing ONE person feel so 'ashamed' to return home without money, he would rather kill himself (and destroy another person's life) than to dissapoint them. No ONE has the right to enforce such guilt on another person for not being able to make something of their life that you can't or won't even attempt, especially when you come from the same apple-tree to start with.

Notice, in almost every case like this, they say they are too 'ashamed' to go home to their families empty-handed?

Thus the reason they put up with such shitty working conditions. Shame. Ashamed so they stay here and get horribly abused by employers. Ashamed so they kill themselves. That, my friend, is the social problem I'm talking about...

It's a lifesytle choice, when you're chosing to put so much weight on another member of the same society that he feels his life is worth less than yours... even though he was able and willing to fight for something better that you couldn't or wouldn't do yourself... You see?!

I dunno... It's of course just my opinion. No matter what, what these guys are doing is ass-backwards. Assume the guy who hits him, is from the same country, same social situation, and just so happened to geta 700Dhs a month job as some rich guys driver...

5:33 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

No Jin.. No one wins...

5:37 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Keef said...

I think it's well past time for diya to be abolished except in cases of causing deliberate harm to someone. Let's talk about insurance instead.

5:39 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

"you've led a difficult life in canada, BUT believe me its nothing compared to what some of these poor urchins suffer in the villages of UP, BIHAR in India or even Sind and Punjab in Pakistan."

I can't disagree with what you're saying hannibal. But take my mother's Sri Lanken housemaid, for example...

She's been diagnosed with colinitis. She's incredibly sick. My mom pays her hospital bills. My mom doesn't let her work in her house, but gives her a salary anyway. My mom allows her to work part-time for others so she can make extra money. (And by the way, this maid is a fucking bitch in my opinion), but none-the-less, it's disgusting that her family back home gets all the money she makes to buy pretty things (my parents visited their home last year, they are just fine) for themselves, and the fact that her Indian husband, who also lives with my parents, but works as a driver in Sharjah, sends all of his money back to his family and can't afford to send to her if she does go home now.. where really.. she needs to be. She has an eight year old daugther, and a disease that isn't ever going to be healed...

Her family is not suffering there. Why is she too ashamed to go home & spend her weakest times with her daughter, where she should be?

6:00 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger archer14 said...

The fact of the matter is that these people are pushed to the limit for no fault of theirs. Would they even think of putting themselves in such a position if the company that recruited them paid in time? Time is of the essence.

Think about the situtation pre september. There were some teething troubles as in every country, but none of the magnitude which we presently witness. And it's getting worse as each day passes.
I'll tell you why. Managers aren't getting their cuts. Over quoting like they did the old way isn't paying off. Add to that the 'globalisation' that Dubai and the rest of the emirates have undertaken. Rising rents means that savings are lesser, luxuries to be curtailed. Who's the first to be strained under these circumstances? The labourers ofcourse. They've no rights, and most people think they are scum for the simple fact that they overcrowd buses and parks.

The UAE is seriously lacking in "infrastructure". If they are not going to play by the rules of the game, the game will teach them the rules, as seen at the riot last week.

Remittances are the basic reason for their stay here. What the family does with that money is something he cannot control. But what he thought he could control was "hope". Even that bottle of liquour isn't able to provide him succour. Now he hopes his death will.

6:35 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger flamin said...

Shk Z (Allah yr7ama) passes away and this is how fast things change..

6:38 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

Wow... Archer... I just finished commenting on your entry about this in your blog...

As I said there, you're right. They are not treated well here, and that MUST change.

But as I asked before...

Why should the UAE government be held responsible for a problem (and the reactions of the initial problem) that start in some other country, ruled by other people?

I think you really should be pointing the fingers at the laws in the countries where these people leave from because their own economy is so horrible they're forced to leave someplace else and end up in these situations.

Notice something about the UAE... It takes care of its locals. No one can deny this. I believe that's the responsibility of every government, at the end of the day... If someone else's government fails to do this, why should some other one be forced to make changes when its own people are satisfied?

6:45 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

'The UAE is seriously lacking in "infrastructure". If they are not going to play by the rules of the game, the game will teach them the rules, as seen at the riot last week.'

Ya think?

Lets follow this case and see what the verdict says, cause all of these people are now going to court. The sad truth is, chances are they'll ALL end up deported (After serving jail time for not being able to pay the 1m in damages they'll be legally liable for), without a dhs in their pockets...

And the company, will simply recruit more people to finish the project.

6:48 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Emaratyy said...

I guess, I should put up a sticker on my wind shield sayin " Don't Jump, I'M BROKE!!"

7:36 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

Please send one of them stickers my way... if you don't mind... Emiraty.

7:48 PM, March 29, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tell me about "blood money". What's the situation? If you are driving a car and you hit someone, is it always automatically considered to be your fault? You are then obligated to pay the victims, regardless of fault?

In certain U.S. states, we have what is considered "no fault" auto insurance. It is taken as fact that accidents do happen in everyday life, and that each individual is responsible (through their own insurance coverage) for paying their own medical and car repair costs. In other states, not so.

8:57 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Emaratyy said...

But not here in the emirates. Its considered to be your mistake whether the whole thing is your fault or if someone deliberately jumps in front of you.
This blood money is does not only imposed for humans, but also if you hit animals, its the same sitution, only the amount varies.
The only animals excluded are the cats, I get to see these squashed up on the road almost every day .

9:04 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

glengarry, actually there is a case in the courts now I read, that a guy is challenging this law, cause he was driving the speed limit 80km/s and some guy jumped out and got killed by him. He's British I think, the driver. It was a couple weeks back I saw it mentioned. Hopefully, it will change something about this law, soon! But as far as the papers say, there's nothing about a verdict.

Blood money is cash you have to pay to the victims family if you kill him either on purpose or by mistake.

9:14 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Hot Lemon& Honey said...

Although I would hate for someone to jump infront of my car...It still makes me sad to know someone is willing to do that to provide a better life for his/her family..
How desperate is that. Sometimes people feel they are pushed to their limits..and I don't blame them. Hungry, lonely, homesick, expectations, much a person can take...
You can view it as being selfish..but I don't see selfishness in that case cause the person looses his life..and their family looses a loved one...
Poverty is my number one enemy.

9:29 PM, March 29, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

I hear ya hot lemon...

But I personally don't believe your own misery is a good enough excuse to make someone else's life miserable... (the driver)... even if you are willing to give up your life for it.

Reminds me of these idiots in my building the other night. I forgot to pay the elec bill, it was 800Dhs. Got cut the other morning. I didn't have time to go, so I gave the watchman the 800 for the bill and taxi. He said they needed 100Dhs more than the amount to turn it back on. I didn't have it in my wallet but promised him I'd give it to him that night after going to the bank. He decided he'd turn on my elec for me then, then go pay it all tomorrow when DEWA or SEWA (which one in Ajman?) would accept it all and officially allow him to turn it on... you know to save himself a trip. I told him not to bother risking getting in trouble by turning it on in the morning but to do it around midnight when I got home and gave him the rest. (If the company checked, it wouldn't be so noticable then.) He agreed. I get home that night and give him the money. There's another guy who is yelling at him cause his elec. had been cut too. He didn't have the money to pay his bill, but decided if the watchman turned on mine without also turning on his he'd make a complaint and get the watchman in trouble for doing it before DEWA (?) had their money.

The poor guy was terrified and wouldn't do it... untill that fucker went back in his house and couldn't see.

It's just not right to make someone else suffer to any extent for whatever reason...

9:37 PM, March 29, 2006  

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