Sunday, June 25, 2006

News Flash! You & Your Blog Suck!

So here we go again… Tainted has found herself annoyed; not only about the expatriate community here, but also bloggers in general. Sam once gave all you bloggers tips on what he thinks is proper blogging etiquette should be, now it’s my turn.

The blogging world does not needMore Copy & Paste News Blogs. First of all, we’ve already got the queen of that around here, there’s no fucking way you and your amateur posting skills are going to conquer her lifelong quest to get to where she is. And at least, when she adds a comment at the bottom of her copied work, she proves to know how to write with skill. Second, if people really want the fucking news, they’ll go to a local news site. Here, let me link a few for you (and them), Gulf News, Khaleej Times, 7 Days; and 7 Days, even has a fucking comment section where you can discuss and make you damn opinion known (and I’m pretty fucking sure a newspaper comment will get far more views than a damn blog comment). You’ll note, that most of us UAE bloggers have local news sites linked somewhere on the front fucking page of our blogs.

The blogging world is also already fucking saturated with UAE National bashers. Seriously, what’s the online ratio of English-speaking-local bashers verses English-speaking-defenders? For fucks sakes, locals are the fucking minority in this country off-line, how the fuck do they manage to get under your skin so? Are you that fucking insecure, jealous, envious, uneducated, ignorant or just fucking spiteful? Or is your self-esteem just shot so far to hell that you need to join the group; the biggest group you can find to feel like you belong? Get bullied in school? Feel like you need payback? If that’s the case, get some fucking therapy in your own damn country and come back later.

And above all that, you know what no one needs anywhere? Dipshits who speak as if they’re talking legitimate facts about EVERYTHING with NOTHING to base their statements on! No one likes your type off-line, don’t expect people to like you online. That’s right, don’t bother going into religion, law, health, fucking astrophysics if you haven’t the slightest insight into these topics, other than what you’d like to presume from what your single minded head has heard someplace.

What’s that? You think that’s just what I do? Here ya go asshole, a list of things I know nothing about and thus DON’T state solid facts about:

1) Your mama
2) Cloning
3) Mongolia
4) Technology
5) Geography
6) Rock Polishing
7) Architecture
8) S&M
9) Spontaneous Combustion
10) The Pope

Is ten enough? Or would you like more?

A few other things, no one gives a shit how many views you’re getting on your blog, or how popular you are in cyberspace. People came to you before you went on about that bullshit, because that’s when you were saying something interesting.

A cyber kiss just isn’t the same as a real one.

And, if you have to keep begging people to come to your blog, it’s a sure fucking sign that you’re doing it wrong. Is it possible you can’t write? Do you ramble inconsistently without staying on a single topic? Have nothing new or interesting to say? Are just wasting more fucking space begging for attention and sympathy from strangers?

All of these things are getting on my damn nerves. And while I’m on about my nerves, so are the stupid fucking pop-up boxes so many of you have for your comments on your blogs. They take forever to load and piss me off, in many cases, depriving you of whatever I was going to say. And believe it or not, sometimes, I have nice things to say.

Now, do yourself a favor and make your way over to Sam’s blog, find his insight on this topic combine it with mine and see where the fuck you’re going wrong.


Blogger maxxedout said...

Geez ..
Someone got up on the wrong side of the bed huh ?

6:34 AM, June 25, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Brilliant! Though I really wouldn't want to get on your bad side!

I just can't stand those hi-tech-freaks especially when they start mixing up real life with cyber life; it's just so not happening. And what bothers me even more that I'm considered to be a loser, because I dont have any cyber pals or whatever and they're like all popular and shit online.I suggest that they get a buddy called "PROACTIV"!!.

9:29 AM, June 25, 2006  
Blogger Cosmic girl said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

11:29 AM, June 25, 2006  
Blogger Cosmic girl said...

talk about one f*cking pissed off chic..
I should go back and count the number of times you said 'F*ck' or 'f*cking'.. now I can't stop using it.. :)
so you're pissed off.. get over it...
or just check out my blog... I know I have something different to write about...and will keep it that way..

11:33 AM, June 25, 2006  
Blogger Herlock Sholmes said...


Hum, I am afraid to comment now, I might get my head chewed off with a barbecue stick

12:02 PM, June 25, 2006  
Blogger Taunted said...

So what you're saying is that my blogs shite.

Well I know who my friends are.

1:59 PM, June 25, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

Max, actually, I hadn’t slept.
pheras, get rid of your pop up box. LOL! Actually that comment was inspired by something I tried desperately to say on your blog before posting this.

’ just went through much of the stuff u write and frankly u need a partner.’

You offering? I’m afraid I’m not interested and I fuck myself just fine. Thanks for the psycho evaluation, though.

As for the rest of what you had to say, keep your local bashing and fabricated personal stories in your own blog. I believe it was your copy & paste local-bashing blog that inspired this post, seeing how it’s the newest one on the block and well, it just sucks.

cosmic girl, allow me to introduce myself. Hi. My name is Tainted, the Swear Mistress, as dubbed by Buj. It’s a pleasure to meet your acquaintance.

herlock, barbeque sticks can chew?

taunted, no. I enjoy your blog. It’s the fact that you’re not answering my calls these days that’s pissing me off about you. You do know, Balushi was lying when he said he found me in an alley, yeah?

2:13 PM, June 25, 2006  
Blogger Cosmic girl said...

swear mistress indeed...
well.. the pleasure is all mine...

11:49 PM, June 25, 2006  
Blogger Taunted said...

I certainly know how to

Don't believe you pet, you gotta PROVE it!!

9:53 AM, June 26, 2006  
Blogger BuJ said...

lol tainted.. what a post and what a comment!!

and yeah, i do believe you know it all :)

1:23 PM, June 27, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

LOL @ Buj...

Shhhh... People will think you're flirting with me.

1:27 PM, June 27, 2006  

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