Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Who the Hell Wrote That?

After reading through that last entry of mine, and realizing it doesn’t even sound like me, I’ve come to accept that I can be a really, really shitty writer at times. I can’t even follow that entry to the end without getting bored. Allow me to apologize now for anyone who had the misfortune of actually reading that.

I’ve been browsing blogs again lately – thank you CG. It’s taking me a while to get around to all the ones that I used to frequent and I’ve seen very few new ones but I’ve got to say, with so little being said about Saddam’s execution, so much being said in the silence and the same hums about traffic, the same idiocy of your average anonymous commentator, not all that much has changed in blogsphere.

I suppose I should make this my official ‘I’m BaAAAAaaaack’ entry and explain my absence, what’s been happening throughout, what’s going on now, and why my blog most probably won’t sound even close to the way it used to, in new entries.

First of all, I removed my blog thanks to that infamous twat who was interviewing expatriates in the UAE for research for a book he’d like to write. I along with others were talked into sharing details of our lives, thoughts, and other information about interaction between locals and non-locals in the UAE under the impression that he was intending to write something positive and truthful about the UAE. When he found himself apprehended by authorities (and believe me, authorities here don’t apprehend people without a hint of a reason), he sent an apologetic note about how all his files including those with my blog url, correct contact details and some of my personal writing – which I did not give him permission to share or publish, were confiscated. I wouldn’t be calling him a twat for this happening, nor would I have been so incredibly offended by this inconsiderate being, had he not written the most arrogant, insulting, absolutely unbalanced, account of his apprehension in the UAE and the UAE society in general shortly after in his blog, without any regard for those like me who still might have been in harms way due to these files being confiscated.

At the time I had too much going on otherwise to even bother with the ass, who if you haven’t noticed has achieved in losing any respect I might have once had for him. Around the time I received this man’s hyped up, paranoid email talking about how his situation would become an international issue because he is a bull-whatever-the-fuck-that-noone-in-the-uae-knows-or-
gives-a-damn-about, I was going through my own personal hell. It simply made sense to remove my blog at the time, and not bother with it at all.

As many of my previously avid readers know, I had gone back home to Canada for surgery. I failed to mention here or anywhere in public exactly what the problem was and without sharing any in-depth details due to potential consequences of doing that (and I’d appreciate it if any of you who know or are intelligent enough to figure it out, don’t say anything here in public – failure to comply will only make me delete any comments and initiate comment moderation) my body was being poisoned by a deceased foreign object. By the time I reached Canada, I was literally on the verge of death and had I not reached when I did, I would be dead now. Thank you Layla123, for your support, right up until the last moment. I’ll not forget it, ever.

It took me well over my month there, and beyond that to recover. I am fine now, and I’m not asking for any pity because of this. I am fully at fault for what happened. Do not misunderstand. I’m sharing these details for the sake of explaining my absence and my very severe change of heart concerning most things.

The bottom line is, I don’t give a fuck anymore about a lot of things I used to, in particular bloggers and most people in general. I learned a lot and my eyes were truly opened. I believe anyone who has been as close to death as I was, would have a similar change of heart concerning life in general.

2006 was a complete bomb for me in most every possible way. There’s no where for 2007 to go but up. Prior to the New Year, I’d started working on all the changes I finally realized I needed to make and stick to. I’m currently spending most of my time attending to souq.com where I’ve become an avid seller. I import items from abroad, I sell the jewelry I make, and I sell off all sorts of odds & ends that are no longer needed, as my parents are leaving to Canada for good on the 10th of this month. I make a fairly moderate amount of money each month from souq, and since I only intend to expand my stock and thus sales, I believe should I continue I should be able to make a really decent amount of money in the next few months time. It’s my solution to not working for another dickhead boss in the UAE again. However, I may have to take up a job temporarily because I’m also in the process of a few other things.

Right now I’m purchasing an apartment, and I’ve succeeded in taking a loan that will cover that expense. The apartment is located close to my ex husbands place, and my sons school which is perfect. The ex husband and I are getting along better than we ever have, and he’s literally shocked me with kindness recently.

The boy and I have separated again, and this time it’s for good. In fact, I’ve given my word to a few people that I’ll never take him back. I’m not sure if I believe myself yet, because the truth be told… I’m a stupid little girl at the end of the day and I really did love the guy with all my heart. It doesn’t help that I’m a romantic at heart, and I’m totally in love with being in love, but I don’t have the time or the energy to date or even meet new people. I’m fucking lonely without him. But currently, I hate him just the same.

So that’s it… That’s what’s been going on and that’s pretty much where I stand now. I’m sure I left a lot of details out and it’s not intentional. I may or may not get around to filling in the rest later.

Until then, may all of us have a better 2007, than 2006 in every possible way.

19 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

ufff..and so maybe, that is why livejournal is blocked now? :S

Off topic: Did you setup another blogger acount? There's 'tainted' and there's 'Tainted Female'. I am confused..

Anyway, I wish you the best for 2007. God bless you.

2:17 PM, January 02, 2007  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

lol, could be actually why they've blocked livejournal again. I'm not sure. I've seriously been pretty far out of the blogging scene all together.

I had another account, http://potentialwaste.blogspot.com, but the new tainted isn't me. A few people have made that mistake already and I worry about backlash she's going to get from people confusing her for me, and my solid reputation for being a bitch, so I left a note on her blog and let her know.

For her sake she might want to change the nick, don't you think? Otherwise, I'm not personally bothered by it. People will catch on sooner or later that there's a difference between her and me. :)

2:50 PM, January 02, 2007  
Blogger black feline said...

welcome back darling...people fasten your seat belt! it' going to be a bumpy ride all the way.............lol
btw...the letter bomb is on the way...lol..just kidding!

3:21 PM, January 02, 2007  
Blogger nzm said...

Congrats on all the positives happening for you - apartment, jewellery sales etc.

I'm with you - let's all wish for a better year this year and make it happen!

3:28 PM, January 02, 2007  
Blogger Taunted said...

Hey Tainted, just remember, there are people on this earth who actually do like and trust you.

And I'm only one of them.

3:40 PM, January 02, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm glad you're back. I'd like to say more but words have been failing me lately. One thing though - I rarely worry for no reason and your post confirms that. 2007 will be good. Or so I hope

4:47 PM, January 02, 2007  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

bf...

Don't blow me up when things are seemingly goin so well. Feel free the next time my life falls apart. You gonna get naked now? Sending me panties... finally?

nzm...

Couldn't have said it better my self. Nice to see you here.

Taunted...

How in the world could I forget? And thank you.

Samoum...

I'm so not following what you just said. But I'll call you soon and I'm sure you'll clarify!

5:01 PM, January 02, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

But tainted female, the other tainted actually got your e-mail on his/her profile! Must be one of your devoted fans! ;)

7:46 PM, January 02, 2007  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

Lol dani...

The Tainted 'profile' you linked is not the one that's joined UAE blogsphere. I don't know who that is, but it's also not me.

The one talking in UAE's profile does not have my email that i've seen. Her profile is here. This one's also written an Arabic entry, and all my readers know I can't read Arabic.

The one you linked, hasn't got a blog at all it seems.

You're right though. It seems I have at least one dedicated reader/stalker.

How did you find that profile? Through which link?

8:35 PM, January 02, 2007  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

lol Dani...

I just realized what the profile you linked was. That is mine. I tried once to convert to beta, but blogger couldn't support a convert while I had taintedrhymes.blogspot (with multiple authors). I only got half way through the process before blogger informed me it couldn't happen. I have a beta tainted profile without a blog, because it won't let me transfer this blog.

Actually, I completely forgot about it until now.

No psycho devoted stalker reader... Just plain old stupidity in me. :)

8:53 PM, January 02, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

loool..ok got it.

10:16 PM, January 02, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's the spirit: explicit, uncensored, and relentless with your thoughts about everything and everyone . I miss that. Not many bloggers and people in person are direct. Yours is appreciated. And your blog is worth the read; word by word.

;^)

wb
www.tantalize.wordpress.com

10:49 PM, January 02, 2007  
Blogger BuJ said...

welcome back!
good to have you back, safe and sound, and wish you all the best for 2007 in health, family, life and everything.

1:53 AM, January 03, 2007  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

Why thank you Tantalize. A pleasure to be here and to have you back. Though I'm afraid my writing is a little rusty still, it should get better eventually.

And Buj... The same wishes right back at you.

3:51 AM, January 03, 2007  
Blogger Lizza said...

I really, really hope 2007 turns out to be lots better than 2006.

Your jewelry business sounds great! I remember some of the pics you posted; they were lovely.

3:06 PM, January 03, 2007  
Blogger Amna_a said...

It's great to have you back and see you doing well..

I hope everything just keeps getting better for you in 2007 and all the years to come :)

Once again, welcome back!

4:43 PM, January 06, 2007  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

Thank you Lizza... And Movie Mania... Thank you much!

5:31 PM, January 06, 2007  
Blogger Jayne said...

Nice to see you back hon & I wish you a really good 2007 :-)

1:18 PM, January 15, 2007  
Blogger babe_uae said...

Thats what friends are for, ignore those that have negative comments seems they bring their life frustrations out in this way, You take care of yourself and it is GREAT to have you back xxx

1:34 PM, March 04, 2007  

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