Thursday, June 29, 2006

Sleeping Dogs Die: Kill It. End the Suffering.

There’s nothing I can’t stand more than inconsiderate people feigning as friends for the sake of taking and not giving. Why do so many people fail to realize that a relationship is give and take, and not just take?

Lovers, friends, associates, it’s all the same. An exchange has to take place in order for the relationship to work; to continue before someone pulls out of the deal.

I have a grandmother I haven’t talked to in years and a sister that I haven’t talked to even longer because they couldn’t understand this concept. I don’t believe I ask too much of any of the people in my life, certainly not more than I’m willing to give to them in return.

Why do so many of you suck so bad? And why haven’t I still gotten it right in choosing the people I let in?

I live in a country where you can make a best friend in a minute, or so it seems with the plastic people. I can’t count the number of people I’ve met for the first time only to learn that I’m now their best friend and that they love me with all their hearts. YOU DON’T KNOW ME FROM ONE DAMN MEETING. I’m sure I’m not alone in experiencing this. It seems the norm for the Arabic and even Eastern European cultures to talk like this, and act like that. If you’ve not yet experienced it, be warned of it and don’t take it at face value because the minute you turn your back, you’re the word on their lips for gossip and judgments.

These people don’t bother me really. They make me laugh. What bothers me are the people I let into my life and willingly give my heart to (as they greedily take all they can); me assuming they are mature enough, logical enough and even far enough from this mind-frame to understand what friendship is really about.

Today, I let a friend go; someone I welcomed in my home and introduced to my son; someone I loved and respected despite any flaw they might have had; someone I believed loved me in return. He no longer will exist in my life. To me, true friends are forever, but only if there was truth in the base of that friendship to begin with. I’m sad to let him go. I really am; sort of like I would be if I had to shoot a dying dog to put it out of its misery. But there’s only so much I’m willing to take. And despite what all you readers might make of me through my blog, I’m a softy at heart. I tend to get walked on and usually I don’t mind. But once I feel your footprints are getting too fucking deep; that’s it. You’re done with me and I am done with you.

Let this be a lesson to all my friends. I’ll love you, respect you, keep you at the core of my heart and be the best damn companion you’ve ever had until I realize you’re not giving me even an ounce of that in return; not giving me anything but heartache and strife. I’ll be patient, but not so patient to let a sleeping dog die once you’ve started abusing me. I have a line. If you cross it, I’m not going to stop you. But I’m also not going to wait around for you to come back; nor will I welcome you if you do.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

The truth has set us free....You're a softy after all...Always knew that after reading your posts and now the truth has set us free....LOL. You ought to complete a quiz by the Dalai Lama, I did. It's worth it.

9:53 PM, June 29, 2006  
Blogger CG said...

Give and take.

When you give, be sure to take at the same time.

Although I do not believe that every relationship has to be give & take, it depends on the people. Some love to give give give and be walked over. Others need to be on the other end only. But you have to say it as it is and make it clear what you want from the start.

You are soft but strong too (a bit like toilet paper ;) sorry....bad one I know.
WTG TF....stand up for yourself.

10:04 PM, June 29, 2006  
Blogger Hot Lemon& Honey said...

I think you and I are going through similar experiences...
I was taught to give and not to expect in return...but this doesn't seem to work with me...and I do feel I deserve to get back in return..but rarely do...and always get hurt...
So now I give only if I am sure that not getting back doesn't matter.
I feel for you...I don't it the weather or the fact we are two pisces!!

2:51 AM, June 30, 2006  
Blogger Tainted Female said...

Louis, where can I get this test?

CG, you know I am. It just hurts to do it. I don’t like to hold a grudge, so I’d rather let it go all together, ya know?

HL&H, Of course you understand and feel for me. We’re little fishes. We’re too damn emotional. I usually don’t expect anything at all in return at all, other than respect. But when I’m taking the time to put effort into this relationship for someone else, and all they can do is dump on me & beat me up emotionally (as if they’re the only one who feels), it’s beyond me. And I won’t continue doing it.


12:32 PM, June 30, 2006  
Blogger Shaykhspeara Sha'ira said...

You know, beware of the one who is swift to praise, he/she will no doubt be swift to scrutinize.

When someone gives you a "high" place in their life, you better believe they will make sure you live up to that idea they have of you, at all costs whether you asked for it or not.

1:17 PM, June 30, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tomorrow 'T', I send it to your G-Box :-)

2:29 PM, June 30, 2006  

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